Two days ago I found out that one of my childhood friends
has breast cancer. She’s 34 and has two children under the age of three. No
doubt the shock of the diagnosis was far more serious for her but I felt like I’d
been slapped in the face. Hard. Really hard.
Here I was moaning and feeling sorry for myself because we’ve
just moved we’re living in temporary accommodation (which just so happens to be
a holiday unit) and I’m anxious about all the new beginnings involved with the
move. Then I found out about my friend. As often happens when we hear of
dreadful things happening to people we love, our own challenges seem quite
pathetic.
How on earth do you process the fact that a friend you had
sleep overs with, talked about boys with, partied with and graduated with, is
now facing the greatest fight of her life. How can I help her when I live
2000km away? What do I say? I just don’t know. I didn’t want to call her when I
found out because I knew it would be a difficult conversation. I called. And fought
back tears the whole conversation. Although we were close in school, our paths
diverged after we graduated and it’s been a ‘long distance friendship’ ever
since. But this friend has always and will always hold a special place in my
heart – even if I forget to tell her and she has no idea how much she means to
me.
We (or maybe it’s just me) get so caught up in our own lives
and the things that directly impact us, that we’re just oblivious to what’s
happening in other people’s lives. And it’s not until something so serious, so
dreadful and frankly, so frightening, happens to a loved one that we stop and
take stock of our own lives. And stop complaining. And stop procrastinating.
And start living. Living for TODAY.
So while I try to process the idea of my
friend going through chemotherapy, losing her breasts and her hair and possibly
not getting to see her children grow up, I’m making it my priority to enjoy, or
at least stop complaining about, what’s happening in my life. Because
seriously, it’s just not that bad is it? If you read this, hopefully it will
make you stop and think about all the good you have, like it did for me.
My friend is strong. And I’m sure if anyone can make it
through this it will be her. I really hope so.
